Happiness?

It's almost indescribable isn't it? Things don't necessarily have to be in order in your life, but it's okay. They're just good enough that you can still smile and laugh, and maybe even love. It's knowing all the wrong things in your life but not focusing on them. It's pushing the drama behind you and pulling that smile out front. It's not a fake front and secretly being miserable inside. No.

It's dealing with all the crap in your life first, so you can enjoy being happy, really happy afterwards. You got to cry to be able to appreciate a smile. There's no easy path to happiness. But when you reach it, not a million words can describe the feeling. 

I already know...

I'm a liar because I wont tell you everything.

I'm stupid because sometimes I'm wrong.

I'm ugly because my body isn't perfect.

I'm a pushover because I like making people happy.

I'm a loser because I'm not a friend with your group

I'm fake because I try to be nice. 

I'm weird because I'm not like you.

I'm fat because I eat when my tummy growls. 

I'm clingy because I don't like to be alone.

I'm insecure because I care what people think of me.

I'm not any fun because I'm not always hyper.

Don't try to tell me who I am...

Because I already know. 

♥

It's the scariest thing ever to realize how much someone means to you.  When it hits you, I mean really hits you, all these thoughts and questions rush through your head at once.  A sad emotion even starts to creep on you slowly inch by inch as you start to wonder.  What if for some reason things don't work? - How are you possibly going to live without them?  Someone that was once a stranger now is the only person you know like the back of your hand.  Someone you once had no emotions for, now has the power to break your heart.  Someone you never used to hang out with, now owns most of your time.  Someone you never thought you'd love, now owns your entire heart.  Someone you once lived without, you now wish to hold on to forever.